Looking for some trouble to get into tonight? Try these:

1) Shop With Pride at Holt Renfrew

So I'm pretty sure I didn't get invited because they looked at my postal code and snort-laughed me straight off their distribution list. Still, someone else sent this to me to taunt and tease, so I'm here to invite you to shop shop shop till you drop drop drop. 

2) Celebration of Light - Mexico

I'll be heading to our first annual Everything Wrapped in Bacon party in hopes that EVERYTHING will be wrapped in bacon. It is Pride right? Show starts at 10pm and English Bay will be a waking nightmare. Still, there's nothing quite like the Celebration of Light. It makes Vancouver soooo purdy.

3) Celebrities Pride Week Imaginarium - Priape Presents Dirty Sanchez from Drag Race 2 and Samuel Colt

Celebrities' live porn shows are legendary. My personal favourite being that pornstar who shoved a red dildo you know where and strutted his way around the stage like a rooster. A close second was when the Flame and the Dame's Tommy D was pulled on stage during Reese Rideout's routine last July. 

Welcome to the start of Pride Week, y'all! About fucking time, eh?

To get things started this week, I'm posting a video for one of the cosmetic treatments I had while doing the Whole New Me package at Weights Fitness and Wellness Studio. Want to freshen up your face before the weekend? Maybe consider one of these:

Not sure what kind of trouble to get into this week? Check out the Ultimate Guide here. And here are my picks for the week for your convenience:

Product: Personal Training Sessions, Teeth Whitening, Diet Plan, Radio Frequency Facelift, Infrared Sauna

A few months ago, I won a raffle for a personal transformation fitness and wellness package from Big Rogers Events at Weights here in Vancouver. You can follow the first parts of my journey by clicking here.

I know this review has been a long time coming. There will be a video component that I'm going to put together over the next couple weeks so you can see firsthand what a radio frequency facelift looks like and what's involved in a balls-out teeth-whitening session. There's a few weeks to go until Pride, and if you're a vain bitch like me and are considering getting treatments like this before Aug 2, you'll know what you're getting into before you book a treatment.

Back to the review: to be honest, I was sort of reluctant to take on personal training sessions. I really don't like being bossed around, and I like working out in big gyms where -- surprise -- you can check out guys while slugging your weights around and getting fit. But I had also hit a fitness wall after last year's LL Cool J Platinum Workout blitz and needed something new to help push my body to build muscle again.

Ever wonder how effective working with a personal trainer is? These may help put any doubts to rest:

The benefits of working with a medium-sized private gym like this include privacy and also the opportunity to work with several different trainers until finding one who can work with you. Bryan handled the majority of my training -- he is a master motivator, fun to be around and managed to push me even when I didn't think I could go further. I also had a few sessions with Kurt, who had a different theoretical approach and had an answer for any question about fitness or wellness that I could possibly ask.

Weights is a great alternative to working out to Fitness World/Steve Nash, the YMCA or other Vancouver public gyms. They helped me put on some serious mass, particularly on my legs, shoulders and upper back. They also helped tone and trim down my stomach (something I've never been able to do by myself). I lost an inch off my mid-section after two and a half months of serious training, despite not following my diet plan exactly. Girl likes her coffee and liquor. What a surprise, eh?

Highlights included implementing 300-style workouts, the infrared sauna bakes and a trip to try laserlipo at Nu Age Body Care.

Lowlights included transit time to and from the West End (selling my car two years ago never hurt more than the past two months) and working through previous soft tissue injuries in my back, left ankle and neck. 

Another unexpected benefit was to my tennis game -- my forehand picked up a lot of punch and I finally won against a guy I've been playing with for the past three years.

If you're looking to start an exercise program, lose weight or get past a plateau in your current workout program, personal training is for you. Try contrasting the results I got from last year's Platinum Workout and these sessions at Weights. Weights was definitely more successful in my mind, and I think the photos show that.

Since this is a lot more serious than my usual blog postings, I hope you found this informative and look forward to some video blogs on the cosmetic treatments I received, coming soon. Good luck with your fitness journeys this summer. Hope to see you at the beach, y'all!

Company: Nu Age Body Care LipoLaser

Location: Yaletown

Product: Laser Liposuction

Another video blog? Yeah I know. That's how much better Macs are for video work.

Listen, bitches. It looks like winter finally ended last Thursday. Now that summer's here, girl needs to start thinking about Wreck Beach. Which is why se's taken to ordering a glass of air and a bendy straw when she goes out now, because let's get real here. There's nothing sexier than asking someone to count your ribs before playing naked frisbee. NOTHING.

If you don't feel like starving yourself skinny, there may be a wellness treatment that you should consider trying but may also never have heard of.  

Background: This April, I won a prize package from Big Roger Events in partnership with Weights Fitness and Wellness Studio to undergo a personal transformation -- to change my body and eating habits into the "Whole New Me" (that was the name of the prize package... nice one, eh?)

I'm pretty tired of the old me. Just saying. So for the past three months, I've been subjected to an intense personal training regimen with Weights, with some extras like teeth whitening, a radio frequency laser tightening treatment, a meal plan, a fitness supplement plan and a laser liposuction session with Nu Age Body Care LipoLaser. 

Much like the Eurowave session I had a few months back, I was surprised at just how painless and easy and effective this treatment was. Nu Age has a beautiful space in Yaletown, and as you'll see in the video, Alecia is a total babelicious professional with a great sense of humour. 

Lastly, my torture at Weights comes to an end this week, and I'll have another video review next week-ish of the crazy body transformation work they do there. In the meantime, my trainer Bryan at the gym is offering all sorts of crazy pre-Pride specials, including the radio frequency facial treatment and a week's worth of training sessions. Get in touch with them if you want to learn more.

Weights Update: I'm about 3/4 through the Whole New Me program at Weights and trainer/God Bryan Runge has told me that despite putting on mass (I'm almost 190 lbs, bitches!), too much alcohol is negating any gains I'm making in the looks department. Who knew. Christ. I don't drink scotch to look pretty. I drink it to look like Grandpapi Horlor looked circa 1985. Bryan has agreed to give me an interim report card this Friday, so check back then to see what horrible things he has to say about my progress. This guy knows his stuff and put me through my hardest workout yet last night (push up 21s anyone? 7 reps at bottom, 7 reps at midpoint, 7 reps at high point, repeat 4 times at end of workout... and voila, your arms fall off at the shoulder).

In other news: 

Photographer extraordinaire Brandon Gaukel sent me a spoof comic yesterday and its Aquaman star reminded me of a number of things:

1. A couple of circuit monsters from last weekend

3. Me in the middle of a panic attack

[photo currently unavailble]

Anyway, I'm a huge fan of K Beaton's work and you can find more at Hark A Vagrant: