Toronto Diary - All posts tagged 'safe sex'
Saturday, February 18, 2012

Teen chlamydia is all the rage

In related news, I have no idea how kids talk these days. Something about Justin Bieber and Call of Duty and that one mopey bitch who sang on SNL . . . fucking teenagers. SPEAK A REAL LANGUAGE. (I am 21, by the way.)

Anyway, a new infographic posted to MTV Clutch (yes, MTV, the fine people who brought you Teen Mom and 16 and Pregnant! There is nothing ironic about that at all) details how a lack of sex education is correlated to dumb teenagers not using condoms and subsequently becoming pregnant and/or infected by chlamydia.

So remember, kids, it never hurts to wear a condom. It does, however, hurt to pee when you have chlamydia. And I'm not even going to try to tell you how much it hurts to push something the size of a football out of a bodily orifice that is nowhere near big enough to accommodate something like that. I'll give you a hint though: it hurts so much, you might accidentally shit yourself in front of a room full of doctors and not even know it. True story!

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Monday, July 11, 2011

Now would be a great time to grab some condoms...

Well... shit. It turns out that while we were busy using science to figure out why we don't eat our own young (true scientific study), gonorrhea's quietly been evolving to the point where there's now an incurable super-strain out there. Is it too early to hit the big red button that says, "Everybody panic"?

"This is both an alarming and a predictable discovery," lead researcher Magnus Unemo, professor at the Swedish Reference Laboratory for Pathogenic Neisseria in Örebro, Sweden, said in a statement. "Since antibiotics became the standard treatment for gonorrhea in the 1940s, this bacterium has shown a remarkable capacity to develop resistance mechanisms to all drugs introduced to control it."

The discovery, announced by Unemo at the International Society for Sexually Transmitted Disease Research meeting in Quebec City, Canada, could hail gonorrhea's transition from treatable STD to global public health threat. (Source)

For now I am going to remain cautiously optimistic. We figured out a way to cure this thing back in the '40s, so chances are that given enough time and funding we can find a cure for this, too. That being said, in case this was not already painfully obvious, you should probably, oh I don't know, WEAR A CONDOM. And don't give me that "Oh, it doesn't feel as good" bit, because as good as barebacking might feel, it's really not worth the way an STD will make your junk burn.

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Jeremy Feist


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