Like cats or porn or Jon Hamm's penis, the internet will never get tired of extravagantly adorable proposal videos. Bonus points if they feature an adorable gay couple!

In a video currently making the rounds on sites like Towleroad, a local Toronto couple decided to make it official by putting together a video featuring their family and friends, before Dave finally pops the question. If this one doesn't nail you right in the feels, you are a Cylon. DAMN YOU, RONALD D MOORE!

Our Story in Letters - Mike and Dave's Engagement from TorontoDave on Vimeo.

Show of hands: who had an Easy-Bake Oven growing up?

Let's face it, an Easy-Bake Oven was like the first step down the long, fulfilling road of homosexuality. The moment you cooked a bland, tasteless, single-serving brownie using nothing but a lightbulb and some pink plastic is the moment you took destiny into your own hands.

Well, good news for a new generation of kids: the first line of unisex Easy-Bake Ovens are coming, featuring non-gender-specific colours and ad campaigns showing that both boys and girls can enjoy fake baking!

According to news reports, McKenna Pope, a 13-year-old New Jersey girl, "got more than 40,000 signatures on her online petition at Change.org and the support of celebrity chefs including Bobby Flay." She wanted to get a gift for her little brother, 4-year-old Gavyin Boscio, but could only find purple and pink ones. Although these nifty Easy-Bake Ovens don't seem as feminine as the ones of yesteryear, McKenna wanted one that she thought would be appropriate for her lil bro.

Hasbro invited McKenna and her family to its Rhode Island headquarters and executives showed off a prototype of their newest Easy-Bake: one that's black, silver and blue. [Source]

On one hand, I think the larger problem is the idea that girls can only do things A, B and C, while boys can do things X, Y and Z, so I think the better long-term solution here is to just let kids play with whatever they want (within reason) and tell anyone who doesn't like it to fuck off. On the other hand, this comic from Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal sums up exactly why the world needs gender-neutral toys: 

It's about a week until Christmas, so I'm particularly vulnerable to feel-good, seasonal stories. Here's one that happened yesterday in the Village. 

I'm sure most of you know Pam Page. She's the lovely little British woman/über PFLAG mother who knits cock-warmers and is generally just ever-present here in the Village like a benevolent fairy godmother.

A couple weeks ago, Pam's son David passed away unexpectedly at a young age, and since Pam was here from the UK as a caregiver for David, the Canadian government decided to deport her. In short, she lost both her son and her home right before Christmas.

So last night, something special happened: Miss Conception decided to donate all the tips from her Seasons of Love performance to Pam to help alleviate the costs of David's funeral and her move back to the UK. Here's the best part: in the space of three and a half minutes, the crowd at Woody's donated a collective $1,000 to Pam.

At the risk of going all Linus at the end of A Charlie Brown Christmas on all of you, that's totally what Christmas is all about: a group of people come together to make the coldest, darkest time of the year better than it ever could have been. So thank you to everyone who came out last night and did a little bit of good to help out someone in need. It's good to know that if you give people an opportunity to be good, they'll come through for you.

If you've never been to the Ikea in North York . . . Don't. Just don't. That place is like a museum of violent, id-driven rage. If you want to see people throw fists and racial slurs over a coffee table and meatballs? Ikea. Ikea is your mecca.

So no, there is absolutely no reason whatsoever to go to Ikea. Except for one special little guy: Darwin, the Ikea monkey!

At around 3 p.m. ET, the diminutive primate was spotted in the store’s upper parking lot, where it was cornered by several Ikea staff members, who also called animal control to come retrieve the monkey.

“It apparently let itself out of its crate, opened the car door and went for a walk,” Toronto Police Sgt. Ed Dzingala said. “Smart monkey.”

“It was just outside the store, just in a corner area where the monkey had no where to go, but it was pretty scared,” said Dzingala.

Ikea staff managed to lure the primate into a corner before calling police, who in turn contacted the city’s Animal Services department, he said. [SOURCE]

Well, I don't see what the big deal is, it's just a little monkey wandering aroun-

OH MY GOD. Is it wearing a jacket? That is the cutest thing ever! If we ever get rid of Rob Ford, can we put Darwin in as our new mayor?

IKEA MONKEY! NOOOOOOO! 

Earlier this week, Toronto's famous gay penguin couple Pedro and Buddy successfully mated with a pair of female penguins, thus sparking a slew of people saying that the penguins were "straight" all of a sudden.

A couple things here:

You know bisexuality is a thing, right? You know, Kinsey scale? It's this thing where sexuality is less about a black and white choice and more about a sliding scale of attraction that takes into account gender fluidity. Believe me, when you take into consideration the astonishingly wide range of things that can turn on an animal (my black lab has tried to fuck three chihuahuas of varying sex . . . CHIHUAHUAS) the idea of a more open-ended interpretation of sexuality makes a hell of a lot of sense.

Why can't we just say the penguins are bisexual? At this point, they've proven they can enter both gay and straight relationships; the sex of their current partner isn't really indicative of their overall sexuality. There's a lot more to sexual attraction than simply gay or straight.