Toronto's Caribbean Carnival has arrived again. While gay acceptance in the mainstream Caribana celebration is still a touchy subject, that doesn't mean you can't have a little Caribbean fun of your own in the Village.

The big one is Caribana in the Village, hosted by Crews & Tangos, which will be running strong throughout the entire weekend. So, chances are that you can probably fit it into your schedule somewhere. If you're looking to travel to the west side, tonight features two DJs, Unruly Twin and Seduce, at Pacha Lounge for Toronto Splash. And, of course, DJ Blackcat is spinning at The Urban Jungle at The Barn on Sunday. Between all of this, you should be able to find something to do to integrate a little Pride into Caribana this weekend. 

And they say July doesn't have any of the good holidays... Anyway, it's World Hepatitis Day, and today's as good a day as any to remind ourselves that hepatitis is still out there and still a pretty unpleasant disease to deal with. So, here's a quick refresher on a few things you should know and how to protect yourself:

• Hepatitis A is found in feces. I know, charming, right? Most people are exposed to it when food or drink is contaminated by someone who doesn't wash their hands after they drop a deuce or through rimming. The good news is that hepatitis A does go away naturally after a few months and is usually not dangerous unless accompanied by hep C.
• Hepatitis B is found in blood, semen, vaginal fluid and breast milk. Like hepatitis A, your body can fight the disease on its own, but unfortunately, about five to 10 percent of cases are chronic, meaning the infected person will have hep B for life. In total, about one percent of people diagnosed will die from hep B.
• Hep C is the motherfucker. It is found only in the blood, but it is far more contagious. Approximately 75 to 80 percent of people infected will never clear it from their bodies and can go on to infect others.
• For the most part, hepatitis is non-symptomatic, which means most people can catch it and not even know. Thankfully, if you're responsible and are screened for STDs on a monthly basis, you can at least know your status and act accordingly.
• Hepatitis A and B vaccines are readily available and are pretty easy to get your hands on. That being said, there is still no vaccine for hepatitis C, and that's the one you should be concerned about.
• Avoiding hepatitis is relatively easy: get vaccinated, use protection during sex, wash your hands (and make sure the people preparing your food do as well) and avoid sharing needles, razors or toothbrushes.

 

(Image via Natalie Dee)

I think I've finally figured out why Rob Ford is getting rid of the bike lanes on Jarvis St:

He wants to turn Toronto into a Mad Max-style post-apocalyptic demolition derby! Well, it's a theory. More of a hunch, really. Apparently, the guy has the habit of talking on his cell while driving, and, if you call him on it, he'll flip you the bird.

He's, of course, denied it, but we here at Xtra have an exclusive photo taken after police pulled him over for the incident:

Nope, still not above making fun of Rob Ford for being a fat douche.

With heavy heart, I read that this year's Fetish Fair has been downgraded to the PG-friendly Church Street Village Fair in hopes of bringing more families to the street. The real Fetish Fair is now relegated to Zipperz. While I get that times are tough and we need to bring in as much money as we can, here's the thing:

Some families actually like the Fetish Fair.

True story: last year, I took both my mother and my grandmother to the fair. Bear in mind, they're not like me: my mother is STAUNCHLY anti-porn, and my grandmother is a sweet little Irish-Catholic God-fearing woman. And guess what? They both fucking LOVED IT. My grandmother demanded to take pictures with everyone, and, of course, my mother made me run and ask men in full-length mesh bodysuits and corset-clad dominatrixes with titties popping out the top to be in pictures with the two of them. Hand to God, there is a picture on my mom's camera of my grandmother flanked by the Scorpio Twins. I'm still begging her to make it the front of our family Christmas card.

The point is that fetish is fun. It's not something you actively want to participate in with your family ("Mother, would you kindly pass the sounding rods, please?"), but everyone can appreciate kink on display. Even my darling old grandmother. 

I swear to God, when I make fun of Rob Ford, I try to make it about how he basically functions out of self-interest and about how if his homophobia were any more thinly veiled, it would be covered in Saran Wrap. Fat jokes about Ford are too easy; they're petty and tend to take away fire from where he really deserves it.

But I'm doing it anyway; this is too easy to pass up.

I was reading up on the city's talks on cutting CPIP grants, and I noticed an odd trend in the way they talk about... You know what? I'll just let you pick up on it.

“There is not a lot of gravy here. Now we’re being asked to do without the flesh, bone and marrow. The mayor is trying to make the city operate without a limb.” - Kristyn Wong-Tam   

“Ford took office saying there would be tons of gravy, but there isn’t any gravy. This is all essential stuff.” - Doug Kerr

“He got elected saying we could cut taxes and promised Torontonians that services will not be cut, guaranteed. We’ve now got five huge documents with very little gravy.” - Janet Davis

I think I know where all the "gravy" has been going...