Monday, October 4, 2010 1:34 PM

This breaks my heart. When I first came out, two young lesbian friends of mine who were part of my youth group killed themselves. It was tragic and horrible. We always have to remember how isolating and scary being a teenager can be, especially if you're queer. My thoughts go out to the family and friends of these girls.

Doug

Monday, October 4, 2010 4:44 PM

I've tried a total of 3 times - I've never appeared as anything but normal until someone found out from a friend I used to have. I was devastated when folks turned their backs on me, being shunned by one's own community is devastating let alone your given family.

Jane

Monday, October 4, 2010 4:21 PM

The title of this article kind of aggravates and angers me...why does it matter what sexuality they are.

Breanne

Monday, October 4, 2010 5:51 PM

agree with Breanne. In the Star article I just read today,nothing was mentioned about their sexuality. It should not matter, what should matter is these two young people felt they had no choice but to leave this planet, now. That they felt they had no where to turn. Never mind the fact that so much newly bought medication was so easily available.

femme

Monday, October 4, 2010 6:23 PM

The reason why it matters is because homophobia is still such a strong force in the world. At least now the truth is being told; even a few years ago, reports like this would have included a phrase like "close family knew of no reason for the victim(s) to commit suicide." (Not that there is a reason to begin with.) It also matters because of the number of high-profile/well-reported queer suicides in the last month.

Ben

Monday, October 4, 2010 8:51 PM

their deaths had nothing to do with them being gay

Paul

Monday, October 4, 2010 8:21 PM

GRRRRRRR...... people need to get there heads out of there asses.... Im straight and even i know that gay isnt a choice and shouldn't be treated any differently then a normal person. In fact on of my best friends is gay and we get along great.... This breaks my heart to see someone so young die over something so petty

Tyler

Monday, October 4, 2010 9:01 PM

I am saddened by the comments that these young girls sexuality has nothing to do with their deaths and shouldn't be part of the story. In fact it is the story. Young queer youth hear on a daily basis how wrong they are just for being in the world. They are bombarded with hateful messages by hate mongering groups, by a number of religious groups, by some of their peers and often, from complete strangers as they walk down the street. In small and rural towns the lack of supportive organizations to balance out the hateful messages adds to the isolation and despair. Youth suicide rates in the general population are much much lower than in the queer community. These two women took their lives together and these two women were in a relationship with each other, how do you possibly justify telling only part of this story?

Jesse

Monday, October 4, 2010 9:45 PM

RIP Chantal, im gonna miss you.
you were a really good friend and im glad to have met you.

Jessica

Monday, October 4, 2010 9:18 PM

what happened, was they were bullied at school and things got out of hand, way out of hand. my friend and i were talking about her the day before she was found, asking each other if we have heard from them. next day my mom calls and said they found her body, my heart dropped at that second.

Jessica

Monday, October 4, 2010 10:28 PM

In an ideal world, their sexuality shouldn't matter. But we don’t live in an ideal world – far from it - and their sexuality was the REASON FOR their suicide. Sadly, ignorance, well intentioned or otherwise and outright hatred are acid on the tender and vulnerable spirits of teenagers and others just coming to terms with the fact that their sexuality is different from the majority. Religious bigots who seem to have a personal stake in a Jesus that allows them to trash other people; then immature and equally vulnerable youth get permission to shore up their own faltering sense of identity by attaching the different.

You have no idea how painful and cruel your easy thoughtless comments are and the price some people pay for taking you seriously. Think before you speak.

Tess

Monday, October 4, 2010 10:13 PM

In an ideal world, their sexuality shouldn't matter. But we don’t live in an ideal world – far from it - and their sexuality was the REASON FOR their suicide. Sadly, ignorance, well intentioned or otherwise and outright hatred are acid on the tender and vulnerable spirits of teenagers and others just coming to terms with the fact that their sexuality is different from the majority. Religious bigots who seem to have a personal stake in a Jesus that allows them to trash other people; then immature and equally vulnerable youth get permission to shore up their own faltering sense of identity by attaching the different.

You have no idea how painful and cruel your easy thoughtless comments are and the price some people pay for taking you seriously. Think before you speak.

Tess

Monday, October 4, 2010 11:48 PM

Uh, to those saying their deaths had nothing to do with them being gay: did you even read this report? It sure sounds like it had a lot to do with identifying as queer: the social pressure, depression, rejection, etc.

Josh

Monday, October 4, 2010 11:47 PM

I would like to send my deepest condolences to the family and friends of these two young women. I had also experienced Homophobic bullying at Caledon Central Public School when I attended there, which is very close to where Orangeville happens to be. I have since forgave these young children at that school where I will never forget the ordeal I had experienced under their very bad behaviour at that time. If I was able to file a lawsuit against this horrible school I went to at that time, as well as even file one at their famillies I would have believe me. There is no reason in my mind why any school at any decade today, in the past, and in the future where a child has to feel unsafe in any school they go to.

Dani

Tuesday, October 5, 2010 7:47 AM

i may not know these two women, but unfortunately i will never meet them. The suicide rates are increasing by the day. Why can't people see that being attracted to the same sex as yourself is not "wrong", and it's not a matter of choice. These poor teenagers/kids/adults can never live their life to the fullest if they can't even walk down the street without having someone yell, or throw something at them. Everyone is important to our community, so when one life is lost, everyone greeves. It is amazing to see what the world has become, or has little changed for that matter. Grow up people, its the 21st century, put the gloves down, put our your hand, and shake that person's hand who you were about to hurt. I send my condolences to the families of these two beautiful, amazing women.

Jess

Tuesday, October 5, 2010 7:20 AM

As the mom of a suicidal young woman I can offer this. Those that contemplate suicide or succeed in taking their own lives rarely do it for 1 reason. It's multifaceted. To say that they killed themselves because they were gay is perhaps the easy way out. Depression, learning disabilities, poor family lives, underlying medical conditions, disconnect in the community - there are so many things that can impact young lives in a negative way. I'm not saying that these girls in particular had these life conditions, just trying to point out that often nothing in life or death is ever simple.

Flikka

Tuesday, October 5, 2010 7:33 AM

While it's heartening to see people saying that "in an ideal world" sexual orientation shouldn't matter, it's really frustrating to see that sentiment followed with sentiments like, "they're just like 'normal' people"... Outright, obvious bullying by homophobes is devastating but, so is the othering that happens to LGBTQQ youth every day by people who consider themselves relatively supportive, even allys.

Tess is right - choose your words carefully - just because you're not intending to be cruel doesn't mean you're not causing harm.

sonas

Tuesday, October 5, 2010 11:13 AM

*i* can't believe that anyone reading this article, on this web site can honestly say "their sexuality is irrelevant to the story." How amazingly blind and thoughtless can you be? My condolences to those who loved them.

blatanville

Tuesday, October 5, 2010 12:53 PM

RELIGION< RELIGION< RELIGION, that's where most of the BLAME should and does lay ! If it weren't for "Gods" RULES, people wouldn't have it in their minds that 'man and woman' is the only way to be !!!!!

I was raised roman catholic, I am a lesbian woman and I know this to be true, as do many. Religion tears people, families apart !

I am so horrified by the amount of young gay and lesbian HUMAN BEINGS feeling like they have to take their own lives so that the STRAIGHTS and RELIGIOUS jerks can be satisfied !!!!!

These lives have been lost but I hope at the very least, this vast amount of suicide in such a short time, will speak volumes and start some very large movements for gay and lesbian and queer people everywhere!! R.I.P all of you !!!

Btown

Tuesday, October 5, 2010 1:37 PM

As a mum, my heart goes out to the families of these two lovely young women. As a PFLAG mum, and the parent of a gay son, my heart goes out to all LGBTQ youth who have been bullied, marginalized, or who just feel so alone. Please, please, please find someone to talk to - a family member or friend, or call a support line. YOU ARE NOT ALONE.

Irene Miller

Tuesday, October 5, 2010 4:22 PM

Their sexuality matters because many LBGTQ teens have committed suicide recently.

Their sexuality matters because their sexuality was why they were isolated, bullied, depressed, and upset enough to commit this tragic act.

Their sexuality matters because the individuals in this world need to change the way they perceive LBGTQ individuals.

Their sexuality matters now in hopes that one day in the future, it will not matter.

Jessica

Tuesday, October 5, 2010 5:18 PM

To all parents out there. I'm a parent of a healthy bright gay man. I always knew he was gay actually since he was 3 years old. Love your children for who they are not what you expect them to be!!! This message is to mostly fathers out there who can't deal with the homophobia God made these children who they are, let them be who they are and help them realize their potential by giving them your support and love no matter what!

Terri-Lynn Procenko

Tuesday, October 5, 2010 5:43 PM

just wonder why people here are complaining about the references to these girls sexuality-

honestly, in case you don't know,my hometown is in a bad way right now-

and it totally matters who these people are

James

Tuesday, October 5, 2010 7:18 PM

This completely breaks my heart.

Kevin

Tuesday, October 5, 2010 11:13 PM

Finally, an article that isn't skirting over the fact that they were in fact a couple! Every other article I saw spent more time talking about one of their ex boyfriends than they did talking about the relationship between these two women.

Although I can see how people would assert that their sexuality has nothing to do with it, I think that we have several more years and several more battles to fight before we can actually adhere to that ideal. As long as we live in the hateful world that we do, this is another one of those battles that needs to be fought before we can make that ideal world a reality.

You can help by attending the vigil tomorrow at 8pm at Church and Wellesley. It will not only be honouring the lives of these amazing women, but also the lives of 7 other youths across North America who have taken their lives due to homophobic bullying, as well. It also mentions the death of Shaquille Wisdom, 13, from Ajax who committed suicide due to queer bullying nearly 3 years ago. It is a well known fact that queer and trans youth are 3 times more likely to commit suicide than their heterosexual counterparts, and this issue needs to be addressed in the way we teach our younger generation, the sexual education that is recieved in schools and the information parents transfer to their children at these impressionable ages. I have posted the link to the Facebook event page if anyone would like some further information.

www.facebook.com/event.php

My support and sympathy goes out to the families of these young women.

Kim

Tuesday, October 5, 2010 11:00 PM

Jessica,

If you have any information at all about the fact that they were bullied and why, then if you have not already, PLEASE march right into the police station and give your witness report. The cops are denying the fact that their suicides had anything to do with the fact that they were lesbians because of a lack of evidence. I know a police officer from Orangeville personally who I am hearing this from, and I went to ODSS. Please come forward and send a strong message through the community. There are far too many people who are avoiding responsibility for this.

Thank you, and I send nothing but the most heartfelt messages to you and everyone who knew them.

Kim

Wednesday, October 6, 2010 8:42 AM

But when will we get real action? We have to ask for things in schools. Like adult monitors in locker rooms and halls. Other students willing to walk their talk and walk physically with gays no matter where they go. We need to not just add that protection, but show the hate-filled people that not everyone agrees with them. We are letting fear rule us and kill us. And one of the titles here says "bullying", it's not - it's murder.
And it's not a choice because that means that every single person in the world is bi-sexual and they can just choose. They can choose a same-sex partner tonight and enjoy it. And that is not so. And straight people have no right to call it a choice because how would they know? They are not gay. ?
We need to educate the school boards, the teachers, we need classes on this stuff. All the time. Early on from like 10 years old and up or even earlier. On compassion and understanding and gay issues. And religion should be in your church or your home and that is all. Not in schools. Not any schools. Not in Country "In God We Trust". No. Religion is about hatred and power and control. It is not about love, that is the guise.

Val

Thursday, October 7, 2010 2:08 AM

YOu can thank the RATZI pope for this kind of thing. And the talibangelicals - teh anything but christian christians who also gave the USA slavery, the KKK, ad segregation.

Its time for everyone to come out of the closet, period. And everyone to embrace them.

and to use your hate crimes laws to go abduct the RATZI Pope etc, drag him to the hague, and try him for crimes against part of humanity.

The catholic church - of hitler still not excommunicated.

The church of Bishop Williamson, who RATZI unexcommunicated in 2009. An unspeakage monster who said that there was no holocaust of Jesus own people, teh Jews, in Germany.

The church which showed its male dominance by burning women at the stake for hundreds of years.

the church that combined with corrupt catholic kings to give the world a thousand year dark ages and within that period, the crusades when 40-50 million arab people were murdered, no wonder they have thier own nut cases.

And the Catholic church of the Molestation. which hid their crimes against children for decades if not centuries.

Because their lust for money and power is the source of all evil.

SteveMD2

Thursday, October 7, 2010 2:03 AM

America needs to change its motto

From one nation under God, to One Nation under Law.

And toss all our own taliban out with a parachute and their bibles over Afghanistan.

As a peace offering to the taliban and Bin Laden. They will help us solve the problem.

As someoe said long ago - politics makes alll kinds fo strange bedfellows. And if the taliban have a little sex fun with these creeps, so much the better. It would be a hit on Broadway in NYC

SteveMD2

Thursday, October 7, 2010 9:56 AM

After reading the response to what I and others have said I feel I need to further put my point forward.

As a past, lucky,survivor of several attempts myself I understand how alone one can feel. How black the future can look.(that's one reason to me the Savage campaign fails by telling people it will get better)A person in a suicidal position can't see that themselves and someone telling them it will without actually working through whatever the issues are will just be ignored. Nice idea but it fails.

My point on that this should be about more then their sexuality is just that.

We supposedly have anti bullying laws in place for schools(regardless of why the bullying) so where are they? Why do youth still feel they must suffer quietly through this, and why do others continue to think they can bully others with impunity?

Also the article mentioned that these two youth purchased a bunch of controlled medications. Why was this so easy to do?

As another mom pointed out, when one gets to the point of taking/attempting to, their life they have gone through several instances of issues in their life where finally they have had enough. Can not take it anymore. They see only one way to get away from all the pain.

Our schools need more supports built into them, much like the school nurse program which we in Ontario haven't seen in our schools for more years then I can remember now.

Our school counselors need better training and should be taking a better active role in the lives of students.(yes hard to do based on how many each student load they have. (which means we need more of them in schools not less)
We need to start saying to politicians that our students do matter and that we need to look at how to spend better to give them more. Not less.

If we only get angry because two gay students, or one or three killed themselves we are short sighting everything.

We are not telling those in power the things we want/need and how to help make life better for our present and future students.

So yes for sure mourn the loss of wonderful lives, celebrate who they where. But lets go further then that and change how all students experience schools.

The anti bullying laws were suppose to be zero tolerances, so educate all students that this is how it is and follow through with it.

My own daughter went through that hell when my ex took her life in July of 06. She had to live through the nasty comments about her mom and their snarky comments which blamed my child for this.

Because others can be nasty, and hurtful to another regardless of someone being gay or not. Even today some odd person will say something to hurt her.

One more thing. I second the comment from the mom who said, if someone knows for sure of bulling instances against Jeanine and Chantal then you need to do something about that. Same when we see someone, anywhere, being bullied (for whatever reason) we all need to speak up. Or we're not much better then the bullies.

femme

Thursday, October 7, 2010 10:59 AM

There seems to be a lot of assumption happening here. How much could school bullying have to do with it, when one of the 'girls' was 21? I stand corrected if someone can present some evidence of this. The conclusion jumping and assumptions going on here are really quite ahead of the information presented. There are all kinds of sources of fatal stress in our lives; sexuality/orientation can be one of those, but it isn't the only one.

Alex

Thursday, October 7, 2010 10:38 AM

Someone blathers: *i* can't believe that anyone reading this article, on this web site can honestly say "their sexuality is irrelevant to the story." How amazingly blind and thoughtless can you be? My condolences to those who loved them.
----------------------------------------------

That's what the family of Jeannine said. Presumably they know her better than you do.

Alex

Thursday, October 7, 2010 10:33 AM

We are not telling those in power the things we want/need and how to help make life better for our present and future students.
-=-----------------------------------------

Oh boo hoo. Stop fetishizing them already. The family said sexuality wasn't the issue. There were mental health problems, and anti-psychotic medications. Before turning this into an issue of big bad society/uncaring government, do your fucking homework.

The fuzzy thinking on here is sickening.

Anna G.

Thursday, October 7, 2010 5:23 PM

Whatever the case I just wish people would always pause and think about how precious life is. I lost a friend growing up to suicide, and it was not easy. Hopefully these friends and families can cope.

Mikey

Thursday, October 7, 2010 8:57 PM

@Anna
I'm not fetishing anything in fact if you've really read what I have written you'd see that I never said they ended their life because of bulling at school.

I also said I believed as was said before me that things are never one issue alone but usually we see the last straw.
And I even mentioned the many new, controlled and seemingly easy to get, medications found.

I did say that if, and I know it does, bulling is happening in schools then we, as a society, are responsible for telling those in power what we need to help this end. And what we(society) need to help support those students.


Try reading everything, with out a presumed idea of what one is saying, before opening up and showing ignorance.

Oh and to be honest, just because family says it isn't the reason, doesn't mean they would have known. Especially if they were not out to their family.

Not sure if you have kids but if you do, can you really honestly say they tell you everything that is going on, hurtful or other wise, in their life. Cause I can say I know I never did and I know I learned a great deal after the fact from my tow kids.

Again not saying I know why they ended their life, only that they did, which is sad no matter the reason.

femme

Friday, October 8, 2010 2:33 PM

CHILL OUT!
INTRODUCTION TO RELAXATION
AND MINDFULNESS GROUP

-Relax mind and body
- Develop skills to cope with depression and anxiety
- Deal with stressful situations in new ways
- Learn how to care for yourself - Increase calmness, awareness and
self-acceptance
-Sociallize with other queer and trans youth

CHILL OUT! is a seven-week group using visualization, writing, movement
and meditation practices to help cope with anxiety and depression. We
welcome LGBTQ youth (25 and under) to come and enjoy the benefits of
relaxation, and of bringing mindfulness and calmness to dealing with
stressful situations, thoughts and feelings, and to just chill out!
Snacks and TTC tokens provided.

Mondays: 4:30-6:30pm
Oct 18-Nov 29, 2010

Central Toronto Youth Services
65 Wellesley St. East (corner of Church & Wellesley)

For more info contact kathleen.oconnell@ctys.org
<blocked::mailto:kathleen.oconnell@ctys.org>
To set up a pre-registration meeting contact Cori at 416-924-2100

Space is limitted!

femme

Saturday, October 9, 2010 6:28 AM

I'm very saddened by the loss of the two young women. Homophobia is so extensive not just in our culture, but in the world. I feel urban queers tend to think it's "pretty safe to be queer," when in reality, the vast majority of countries in our world have laws on the books for either long term imprisonment for acknowledged queers, many even handing out death sentences for same. We must support our supports, of any sexuality, and be open role models for queer youth. I immigrated here from the United States this year, and as far as I am concerned, most any state, province, country, etc in rural areas would happily turn a blind eye to "a Matthew Shepherd" murder/beating. Being aware of our surroundings is vital for all of us, and taking nothing for granted. Again, I'm terribly saddened at the recent loss through suicide of young queers.

turquoise